To quote Spinal Tap (and a good friend of mine) sometimes you get "too much fucking perspective"...
The Mercy Seat is about to become an outlet for the purest positivity. I have completed exactly one calender month without a single pharmaceutical passing my lips. But more of this tomorrow.
As I have been musing on the changing thrust of my blog, I have been strolling back through old posts. I have found some interesting threads, patterns, if you will. But I have also read many, many instances of a 'man' whining and vituperating over his treacherous colon and thus imperfect life. And then last week, on wednesday, I got some perspective.
A friend of mine at school died suddenly and tragically, in his sleep in the early hours of wednesday morning. He was 40. He was also one of, if not the best and most well-loved teachers I have ever worked with. He had time, patience and kindness for pretty much every student I witnessed him with. He was also bloody funny and made me laugh about something nearly every time we spoke. It is a sad, frustrating and inexplicable loss.
And so the perspective... I am well. I am going to stay well. But, you know what... whatever happens I have a great deal: wonderful wife, beautiful kids, loving and supportive friends... much more than than I haven't got. Life is too important to let this disease control and dictate it. It's my life. I'll decide what I eat, where I go, and when I want to take drugs. Time to start living again.
Rituals of Loss
3 months ago