- The first two weeks back: no toilets. Not ideal for a man in my condition. Actually I exaggerate here, because it was the student toilets, not staff, and it wasn't all, but about 75%. However this still begs two questions: i) surely, if you are going to refurbish the toilets in a school of 1700 students over the summer holiday, you do it before they end? ii) is there not some law about the minimum number of toilets available - some sort of child-to-toilet ratio - that forces the institution to remain closed? I tried that second one in order to secure another week or 2 off, but to no avail (I know, I know...). I shoulda got out my NACC card.
- Incidently, I have worked at this school for 7 years and this is the second time the students have had a complete toilet overhaul. The first time they even got to vote on the colour (citizenzhip at work...). This second hold-up was due to the 'vanity units' beng unsuitable. Now call me a cynical old bugger if you like, but never have they refurbished the staff loo. And there are only 3 male cubicles in the whole school - a lenghty building, at least 300m from end to end. And the one nearest me is, frankly, disgusting. Someone should be ashamed.
- Crappy timetable. No free periods on a monday or a friday - surely the days when one needs to be cut a little slack?
- Good results for my last GCSE group. I cannot take much credit - they were a great group of kids. Sadly this already means somebody is setting targets for next year based on exceeding this year - because year-on-year the government/management/public can only perceive that results must get better (as measured by grade totals). Cos there's nothing invariable about 330 new children each year, is there?
- New GCSE group contains the most arrogant girl in the world. Cheeky kids I can take. Lairy kids I can take. Mouthy, sweary, downright bad kids I can take. But, arrogant kids I just want to slap.
- A strange cyclical UC situation. I have noticed this happening before. But not while I was on the meds. I am still taking 5/10 mgs of preds alternately, which has continued to keep evertything relatively stable. But I am definately going through a sort of poo-consistancy cycle. It goes something like this: On holiday things got loose (I put it down to the tomatoes) then it all got a bit stuck (change in water thinks I), then we got home and things loosened up again (change back to the normal water, plus pre-school mild apprehension?), then it firms up again, so much so I even started to carelessly risk olives (!) spicey food (!) blue cheese (crazy fool!) and so on, but it only got more stuck (even... brown bread!!), and now its got loose again (doh!). I have not had to go to the loo more than twice a day, during loose periods, too often, so its not been horrendous, but it has lead to more of the old mental scouring of everything I have/have not eaten/drunk. And several occasions of crouching and staring intently into the bowl trying to identify morsels...
- So, I 've made an appointment at the GP's for next tuesday to get more preds, cos I don't want to stop taking them just yet and I'm running out. And I've just found a bloods envelope (that I hid from myself) that reminds me I'm supposed to get a test while I'm on the 5/10 split.
- I'm back on those blinkin' yogurts...
- Everything has been put into perspective by the birth of my best friends baby boy. Fab.
Rituals of Loss
3 months ago